my studio desk
White curtains of windswept snow swirls were hurrying across the road today as I took the cat home from her annual vet checkup. Daily life is filled with common moments like that ~ stoplights, vet appointments, dusting, paying bills. Some of it satisfies: the wall of finally hung framed things, the room painted, the car cleaned out. Some of it thrills: the bowl of mint ice cream, the cardinal at the feeder, newly painted toes and a letter in the mailbox. But most of it is part of the larger cycle of living, of continuance ~ laundry, dog walking, keeping the logs piled high in the mudroom, cooking, washing. Staying clean, warm, fed and dry takes a lot of upkeep. These things will need to be done again, and then again, for as long as I live. This is part of the rhythm of life.
I've been thinking about my grandmother, about her days raising four children, cooking, baking, washing. Her struggles and challenges and character and how, at the end of 89 years, she had accomplished something. I keep thinking about that something.
She wasn't famous, she didn't invent anything or create anything huge. She lived her daily life with grace, patience and a sense of humor. She looked for beauty and overlooked little petty things. She listened. I wanted to be around her. And that seems enough to me.
I've been asking myself the question lately, when stumped or overwhelmed with things to finish ~ what would this look like if it didn't have to be perfect? If it didn't have to impress anyone or have a bigger purpose than right now? If my day sometimes is just keeping up with the upkeep of living? If my work never becomes well-known or makes lots of money and that's okay? If, at the end of a long life, my life was filled with moments like this and I handled them with patience and a sense of humor?
What if this, this right now, is enough?
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16 comments:
what a sigh of relief. :) thanks for sharing. i love reading your blog.
ahhhhhh...yessss....
somer ~ you're welcome.
effie ~ thank you so much for your encouraging "letter" the other post! it is awesome. I bet you have so many great memories of your grandparents. :) it's so bittersweet.
Thanks a lot for this post, Brooke. A nice reminder.
And I love your recent polas, always such a treat for the soul.
I have been thinking about this a lot lately too. It makes me feel good about the life I am starting to build with my husband. But sometimes it is so hard to keep feeling satisfied with everyday. Anyway, I think the way you put it is the best and just great.
this was lovely to read. :)
to remove oneself from the present and see all of life for all the wonder it holds. to see all we have as enough-- always enough-- is a gift.
thank you for this post.
it IS enough, but somehow we get distracted by what we believe is ambitious and "better" and inevitably get in the wrong head space...well, at least that's how it works for me :)
:)
Thanks, Katarina :)
Keia ~ It is hard to keep feeling satisfied. Feeling satisfied all the time would be easy, but not very varied I guess ~ it's not really practical to imagine I would, I mean, but I still hope and strive for it!
Thank you, Victoria!
Alfie ~ thank you for that comment. :)
Reneé ~ True. I've been trying not to get into "good" "bad" and "better," and think of things as what they are. They just are. When I label things "bad" it really does have a poor effect in my mind on my experience.
leaf on tree ~ :)
this is beautiful. perfectly written. i forget sometimes that this is enough and push push push until i myself have nothing left. this was a great fresh breath of air. thanks for sharing. :]
it is enough. why is remembering that so difficult sometimes.
I love this post, so much. I'm saving it away for those days when I have the doldrums or am bogged down in the mundane.
I'm so sorry about your grandmother. I've been reading each post and it sounds like someone my own dear, busy, crafty, strong Gram would have been friends with. We learn so much from our grammies.
Hi, I've been reading your blog for a few months now, but haven't yet commented.
This was such a lovely post (a sentiment that I often think but have never been able to put into such perfect words) I just had to comment on it (and bookmark it!).
Also - to say I'm so sorry for the loss of your grandmother. She sounds like such a remarkable woman - much like my own Nana. We're lucky to have such strong, beautiful heros in our lives.
i think all those things too. swap out a few tasks for a few of my own. i think about pausing. about pausing and creating a comfort in that pause. instead of thinking that it is even a pause. it is probably the most difficult thing for me to do. to claim the now as enough. and claim (or i mean notice) the grace that surrounds me all the time. thx for sharing these words brooke!
Ozetta & Elizabeth ~ thank you!
Angela ~ "dear, busy, crafty, strong" pretty much was my grandmom, yes!!
Karen ~ Thank you and yes, we are lucky. :) I feel so fortunate because I've seen her role as she grew older and how life could be lived generously.
Curiousadventure ~ yes, just to stop the constant movement and rushing. To do things with a sense of balance. Creating a comfort in the pause is a beautiful way to say it. :)
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